Monday, November 14, 2011

Dancing Nude For A Blind Man/Love Responsibly

A friend once said loving someone who does not appreciate you is like a beautiful lady dancing nude for a blind man. TOTAL WASTE OF TIME! I totally agree with the statement and the unfortunate part was most of us end up being that beautiful lady dancing nude for someone "blind" in our lives. We hear the rhythm of our heart beat [sic] as it skips for that person and we keep dancing...totally wasting our time.

Now, I'll add I've danced a few styles for someone. I also have to add that I am also a bad "dancer" but lucky for me "the music stopped". A question I'll ask & give my opinion is, Whose fault was it when we fall in love with someone that doesn't feel the same way, who is to blame? My answer is the individual that fell in love. Take this instance, you walk into a gallery and out of hundreds of artworks displayed you fancy a particular one. And you say to yourself "This one is beautiful?". Another individual might take a glance at the same artwork and feel the opposite emotion and walk away, without a second thought. Even if you can't put the reason you love the artwork in words [which might be due to your limited vocabulary] You end up buying the piece and have a spot for it in your home. You bought the idea the artwork was beautiful and it would make you feel good.
When you bring the same idea into relationships, you'll realise that we are the ones that decided what we want to love in people therefore we indirectly decide on who we want to love. The person becomes the SUMMARY of human qualities we love. If you love human qualities such as kindness, humour, and patience, and we noticed/assume Mr Jack/Miss Jill posses those qualities. Instead of saying "I love kindness or I love humour", we say "I love Mr Jack/Miss Jill". The point I want to make at this point is people don't love by mistake or forced to. Even those who love at first sight are those who were able to see all that they would like a person to have at first sight. This is possible because we tell ourselves what we are hearing are the kind of things I want to hear. And what I'm seeing are the kind of things I want to see. When we feed our eyes, nose, and ears and we like what we perceive, we feel good within ourselves and that culminates to what is known as emotions. Since the person posses qualities that elicits pleasant emotions within and also makes us feel joy, they become our source of joy. And no one in their right senses would want their source of joy go away. So we attach ourselves to them because they best satisfy us.

As long as we experience those pleasant emotions we are selfish enough not to care if the other person was feeling the same. We only become aware when they start acting up and they stop displaying those qualities we love. These emotions are like drugs, a crack addict does not decide to stop using and become her/his normal self in a day. Even as she/he quits, there are bound to be withdrawal syndrome. When someone is trying to take the pleasant emotions you feel away, there are also bound to be withdrawal syndrome/unpleasant emotions. Some cry, some feel totally useless and used. And like drug addicts, despite the fact you say "this is my last one", or "I'm not going back to him/her" we find ourselves going back and saying it all over again.

This might sound like a cliche but the best way to love and not end up dancing nude for a blind man is to love yourself. If you want to love any human quality, love the ones you have. That way you'll always feel loved and be the source of your joy.


  1. Loving the analogy to dancing nude for a blind person....very on point.

  2. Ohh..Wow. This. I. Can. Relate. Cheers!

  3. I totally relate with this....I v been dancing nude for a blind man since i can remember...

    1. Thank you, glad people could relate with it.