Monday, January 23, 2012

Sterlin' Bank...the One Customer [Only] Bank

I'm not a Bank person, probably because I believe the institution had the worst customer care (that is debatable once we consider MTN/Airtel/Glo/Etisalat). The first/last (and hopefully ONLY) time I was in WEMA Bank I had so much to say/write that a staff had to comment on my blog post. This time, someone requested I help deposit N1,000 into the daughter's account with Sterling Bank...the one customer bank. It was my first time of stepping into a branch. I have to mention, by the time I stepped out I was convinced they took their slogan "one customer bank" literally.
Location: Awolowo way, Ikeja.
As I stepped into the premises I noticed it had just a door into the building #ONE DOOR. I was also the only person about to get in and maybe that was the bank's idea- one customer at a time. It was weird because the banks I was familiar with experienced high influx of customers during the last opening hour of the day. The time was 10 minutes to 4 o'clock and I was the only one present. I stepped in and noticed the staff behind the counter were poorly dressed. Maybe because it was a Friday but Guarantee Trust Bank (GTB) staff dressed all days of the week as if they were going to a party. I got a deposit slip to fill and stayed on the queue which had only me on it #ONE CUSTOMER ON THE QUEUE. The guy and babe behind the counter were attending to customers #ONE GUY AND ONE BABE BEHIND THE COUNTER, I had to stand and just...look round. The bank looked like a waste of space. Spacious and not buzzing with activities. My thought had the idea of renting the space by the corner to make/sell my roasted plantain a.k.a Boli. I'll also sell recharge/call cards (everyone sells recharge/call cards). Like a minute later the floor manager (I think) began to shout "One Customer! One customer!" #SHOUT ONE CUSTOMER. The staff behind the counter began to hurry up. I was confused, probably it was a code to run or something. I took a step back and began to think of where to run if I see the staff leave the counter. The lady was the first to be through and called me to come forward. I later learnt from a staff they say/scream/shout "One customer!" when they!t, I've forgotten. The staff told me it had nothing to do with me.
I didn't write this to diss Sterling Bank, just don't understand why they decided to literally build a bank around a slogan. I mean, on the 19th of January 2012 their share price was N0.98 which was just two kobo less than #ONE NAIRA.


  1. Talk about jinxing by branding!

  2. This is one of your best i've read.

  3. When you said, "ONE of the best..." Was it an attempt to stick to the "ONE" theme? I am not even sure if I should take it as a compliment because I'm sure I've written better pieces.

    This piece was supposed to be uploaded last year December...that's how much I was unsure people would relate with it.