Tuesday, May 21, 2013

7-Month Ultimatum

I have three questions...

How much must you know about a person before you agree to date 'em?

How much of who they are is required to be acceptable before you agree to be engaged to 'em?

Last question, how long is too long to remain engaged to a person without a concrete plan to walk down the aisle?

You see, marriage is a very important goal (to most people, especially females). If I were to reconstruct Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, "Marriage" would be the 3rd stage.

Growing up females believe marriage should come easy. All they need is to see is Wedding Potential in the guy. Love is no longer a requirement. Nowadays marriage is independent of true love- they are separate entities. Women will be like, "even if I don't love my husband I'll love my kids". Still, a lot of single girls are out there.

I overheard a conversation between a woman and her boyfriend of 6 years. The statement that caught my attention was, "You are too relaxed...I give you 7 months to pay my bride price and set our wedding date. I can't keep waiting for you".
The woman gave her boyfriend ultimatum. Is that necessary? Because that only shows the level of desperation. The question I asked was, "If after 6 years your boyfriend isn't ready to commit on that level, what makes you think 7 months will make the difference? Even if he goes along with your plan, what makes you sure it was his will and not threat?"

Her response showed she didn't care as long as they marry. Sadly, a whole lot of girls have this mentality. A mentality of end justify the means when marriage was concerned- you could steal your bestfriend's boyfriend if he would marry you.

With keen interest, I'll see if this woman will be married by December.

Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone provided by Airtel Nigeria.

Monday, May 13, 2013

Past, Me, & Things I Can't Change

I met someone. The way she makes me feel is like a kid with a new toy- pure excitement. For instance, I think about her and I smile...you know, with such feeling the sincerity in my voice should be projected. The feeling overwhelm me to the point of being certain If it were a movie, we would fall madly in love. But this isn't reel life... this is real life.

It's strange because who she is contradict what I believe was my type. My type, is a girl like...(probably someone I had described in a previous post). She does posses important qualities though- someone I can talk to for hours. Anyway...

There are issues she raised. Issues from my past and things I can/can't change. She described one of them as a "veil" covering her eye, so she can't "see me". Hmmm...

What if I change, isn't that conditioning? Is that a test to prove I like her? Why should I prove anything?

I told her to accept first. That's how I believe relationships should be built, just like a house. Do you know you can build your desired building on any soil once you accept each soil is different and treat it as such? What vary is the type of foundation to make the building stand solid. So maybe my past and who I am don't make the "perfect soil" but that doesn't mean we can't have the perfect foundation.

What do you think?V
Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone provided by Airtel Nigeria.

Friday, May 10, 2013

Negotiate Condom Use

"How many people can confidently say I am the one person my partner is having unprotected sex with?"




Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone provided by Airtel Nigeria.