Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Touch Of My Hand

"I’m not ashamed of the things that I dream
I find myself flirting with the verge of obscene
Into the unknown, I will be bold
I’m going to places I can be out of control
And I don’t want to explain tonight
All the things I’ve tried to hide
I shut myself out from the world so I
Can draw the blinds and I’ll teach myself to fly
I love myself
It’s not a sin
I can’t control what’s happenin’
‘Cause I just discovered
Imagination’s taking over
Another day without a lover
The more I come to understand
The touch of my hand..."

That song by Britney Spears is all this post is about, and if you don't get it by now...sorry, I'm not going to use the M word but I'll give you another clue, self-gratification. I once said the number one lie people tell was, "I don't lie". I think this should be the second. People deny they do this. But I know, whether you are a virgin or not OR you are simply confused if you are still a virgin, you can't bullshit me you haven't done was human nature for you to understand the touch of your hand as you explore erogenous zones. You know, those places that takes you to a higher place.

I aint gonna lie, it helped me a lot. For one, it helped me understand where sperm was released from. And also that sperm didn't look like a tad pole with the naked eye. You see I grew up a great thinker and when I learnt about sperm from a science teacher who was scared to cross the imaginary line of decency I was left confused. In my own understanding of his words, sperm came out from the balls. I knew where the balls were, after all I had be kicked there a few times BUT which channel did it exit the body from? If the school teacher had said sperm was produced by the balls and released through the penis, next time I was drawing the female reproductive system I would have written at the vigina "Insert Penis Here" to show I understood. Like sweat, I use to think sperm would be released through the balls sack *why did I even have that thought?* Anyway, by the touch of my hand I discovered Sperm.

Like I said, self-gratification had taught a lot of people so many things and one of them was that the female body indeed had a delayed sexual response cycle. Most girls complain that they weren't being satisfied by their men...he cums early and they were left half-way and all that. If it was the guy's fault how come when it comes to self-gratification guys still cum faster than girls. Guys don't even need toys...but girls, they have a multi-millon dollars industry designing dildos, vibrators, and Ben Wa balls to satisfy them. My point is, guys if you can't make a girl cum, relax, even they have difficulty in making themselves cum.

Self-gratification was no doubt a remedy for sexually frustrated individuals especially men. It was a quick temporary fix for a rush of blood to the penis. I remember in camp...where men had to sleep in what could have passed for a wearhouse. There were bunk beds arranged in rows but that didn't help in the perception of overcrowding. The room was poorly ventilated and the heat emanating from the bulbs only made the condition worse. A decision was reached to switch off the bulbs at night. On one of those nights someone for whatever reason switched them on as he stepped in...with the sudden illumination everyone became wide awake and eyes shifted to a guy jerking in his bunk. That was what caught our eyes. The guy had reached a point of no return as he was about to release...which he did and came back to his senses. Trust guys...this guy became the joke of the night. But he was bold o. He confessed that wasn't the first time he did that in the bed and passed the blame to girls. He added he doesn't have a girlfriend and girls were fond of turning him down. On a good year he would have sex twice. I felt for him...having sex twice a year, it was traumatic having wet balls only twice a year. Did I mention this guy was in his thirties? He was. If he was my friend I would have introduced him to some gehs from Imo state...then, on a bad year he would not have had sex twice that year.

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