After an operation (appendectomy) I was required to stay indoors for 3 weeks to recuperate. It was a boring 3 weeks. I wasn't your typical outgoing individual but I felt I was in bondage knowing going out wasn't an option. I practically stayed in bed for over 80% of the day. The weekend of the third week I decided to treat myself, nothing special, just hang out in public places alone. First on my list was to get to Shoprite at Surulere to get Pizza and a bottle of red wine. Sit somewhere in the building with my ipod on and relax. Had no idea of what to do next but I knew I was going to watch a movie before heading home.
If you had seen how I had dressed, you would think I was going for a party but in all honesty I was celebrating life. The last thing before stepping out was to decide on which footwear to put on. I walked to one of the stores at home which I had converted to a closet and realised all my fly kicks were gone. The shoe rack was totally empty, damn...I had no more shoes.
I had not noticed within the past 3 weeks and now I had no idea when they were moved/taken/stolen and by who. No one had an idea of where they walked to and I saw everyone as a suspect.
SUSPECT 1: Mother: I was a graduate and was still putting on fly kicks. She expected me to start putting on shoes that sounded like a metronome whenever I walked. She probably took everything to force me to begin wearing corporate shoes.
SUSPECT 2: Sister: Her room was closest to the closet. Her birthday was coming and she had been complaining of how broke she was. She probably sold them to raise birthday funds.
SUSPECT 3: Brother: For the sole reason I call them fly kicks and not trainers.
SUSPECT 4: House girl: She already had a 'criminal record' of stealing my sister's clothes to sell.
SUSPECT 5: Gate man/House boy: He was a crook and never gives change for things he was asked to buy. I don't send him anywhere, I find it difficult sending people on errands. Lately he developed a gambling habit, a habit difficult to maintain/control. He might have stolen them to pay off debts.
I looked at my suspects critically and decided it was suspect 5, house boy. The guy denied as expected. The first thing I did was update my facebook status and told the guy I was going to take him to the police station, but I had no shoe to wear. Nice. I asked the guy why he turned me to an Isrealite, then again, they had shoes. The guy was always quick to deny and after I said few things he developed a fever. I became convinced he was the one. Got some badt guys and fly kicks for my fly kicks begun. He denied until he was about to be tied upside down...he confessed and all I could say was, "My Guy!". He hid my fly kicks in his friend's place five streets away. They had sold few of them and also left the left foot of my Nike Air Max.
That was the last time I saw him, like Trump would say, "You are fired!". He wasn't sacked because of the value of the fly kicks but the motivation behind stealing them. He was developing habits to sustain his gambling habit and when it was someone you place at the entrance of your home, you had to be very careful. My plan for the day was thwarted but I had a good laugh.
Thursday, June 9, 2011
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
Birth Control Pills For Men...Finally
I read a medical research report that stated advances made in the completion of birth control pills for men. The main idea I understood was it works on vitamin A which was necessary for sperm production. So far it had been successful on mice. What exactly are the implications of this drug?
For one, they say if you want something done right you had to do it yourself. Depending on a girl to use birth control pills have made a lot of guys unexpected fathers and children, bastards. At times you wonder, "What was so difficult for you to take two pills at specific times?"
Gold diggers would no doubt suffer, you know those ones that want to have your baby to guarantee financial life support. A lot of millionaires have at least one. The guy would simply tell her, "I don't mind if you do not use your pills, I have used mine so don't tell me stories in 9 months."
On the moral side, what does it encourage? They are called birth control pills and not STD control pills and this would only encourage 'unprotected' sex. In my opinion, finding a lasting solution to cure STDs should be top priority, after all we still have condoms and other birth preventive methods. A breakthrough was reached in the cure of HIV but it was damn too expensive. It involved bone marrow implant of unique individuals with mutant gene immune to the virus. So far only one person had been cured.
Anyway, assuming I am married I won't mind using those pills 'cause birth control pills could make a girl blow up and I wouldn't want my wife to grow fat.
For one, they say if you want something done right you had to do it yourself. Depending on a girl to use birth control pills have made a lot of guys unexpected fathers and children, bastards. At times you wonder, "What was so difficult for you to take two pills at specific times?"
Gold diggers would no doubt suffer, you know those ones that want to have your baby to guarantee financial life support. A lot of millionaires have at least one. The guy would simply tell her, "I don't mind if you do not use your pills, I have used mine so don't tell me stories in 9 months."
On the moral side, what does it encourage? They are called birth control pills and not STD control pills and this would only encourage 'unprotected' sex. In my opinion, finding a lasting solution to cure STDs should be top priority, after all we still have condoms and other birth preventive methods. A breakthrough was reached in the cure of HIV but it was damn too expensive. It involved bone marrow implant of unique individuals with mutant gene immune to the virus. So far only one person had been cured.
Anyway, assuming I am married I won't mind using those pills 'cause birth control pills could make a girl blow up and I wouldn't want my wife to grow fat.
Sunday, June 5, 2011
I am Allergic to Broke Girls
I thought Africans never had allergies until I proved myself wrong. Found out I am allergic to broke girls, that breed of the other specie, that is financially incapable of taking care of their necessities. Despite being monetary handicapped she still demands from a guy WANTS instead of NEEDS.
Feel free to call me names, I was fortunate to be born privileged and never for once take that for granted. So from my position I understood the expectation of performing act of charity but I will rather give a beggar $1000 than give a girl $100 to fix her hair especially when I know she couldn't afford it. That is how status works, a millionaire is willing to give another millionaire an expensive gift he knows they both could afford than give someone who can't. So the very few times I dated broke girls I couldn't get myself to spend, it felt like I was doing something wrong, being scammed. The girls themselves made it obvious because poverty has no hiding place. I noticed while a girl of similar status would demand I spend money on experiences, like watching a movie together, broke girls demanded material things that would benefit me in no way, like buy a new phone. More like bad investment.
I know not all girls are like that...I know, but their number is not significant to those that are broke and stupid at the same time. I see them and I cringe. Have I ever mentioned one that came to my house and said it was my friend's house which I had 'rented' it to woo her (Probably I'll write about that, A Poor Girl's Poverty Mentality). That was the last time I saw her...
Even if my relationship with a rich girl doesn't work out, I am satisfied. Compare the financial implications of (Michael Jackson/Lisa-Marie Presley split, or Brad Pitt/Jennifer Aniston) divorce to (Mike Tyson/Robin Givens and Paul McCartney/Heather Mills divorce). The later that didn't marry wives of similar financial status paid heavily for it.
Feel free to call me names, I was fortunate to be born privileged and never for once take that for granted. So from my position I understood the expectation of performing act of charity but I will rather give a beggar $1000 than give a girl $100 to fix her hair especially when I know she couldn't afford it. That is how status works, a millionaire is willing to give another millionaire an expensive gift he knows they both could afford than give someone who can't. So the very few times I dated broke girls I couldn't get myself to spend, it felt like I was doing something wrong, being scammed. The girls themselves made it obvious because poverty has no hiding place. I noticed while a girl of similar status would demand I spend money on experiences, like watching a movie together, broke girls demanded material things that would benefit me in no way, like buy a new phone. More like bad investment.
I know not all girls are like that...I know, but their number is not significant to those that are broke and stupid at the same time. I see them and I cringe. Have I ever mentioned one that came to my house and said it was my friend's house which I had 'rented' it to woo her (Probably I'll write about that, A Poor Girl's Poverty Mentality). That was the last time I saw her...
Even if my relationship with a rich girl doesn't work out, I am satisfied. Compare the financial implications of (Michael Jackson/Lisa-Marie Presley split, or Brad Pitt/Jennifer Aniston) divorce to (Mike Tyson/Robin Givens and Paul McCartney/Heather Mills divorce). The later that didn't marry wives of similar financial status paid heavily for it.
A Child Soldier Will: Johnny Mad Dog
This was from the movie Johnny Mad Dog performed by General No Good Advice.
It is my will that when I die
Don't bury me, don't bury me
You cut my dick in alcohol
And call my wife and give it to her
And when she cry, let her cry
When she roll let her rock
And what the fuck she thinks she is
She fucking around with my GI dick
Another man will counsel her
Another man will comfort her
Take my rifle and my bonnet
Call my son and give it to him
Let him defend or let him fight
For his country, for his people
It is my will...
Death dealer!, "No die, no rest.
Gentlemen, keep moving."
It is my will that when I die
Don't bury me, don't bury me
You cut my dick in alcohol
And call my wife and give it to her
And when she cry, let her cry
When she roll let her rock
And what the fuck she thinks she is
She fucking around with my GI dick
Another man will counsel her
Another man will comfort her
Take my rifle and my bonnet
Call my son and give it to him
Let him defend or let him fight
For his country, for his people
It is my will...
Death dealer!, "No die, no rest.
Gentlemen, keep moving."
Saturday, June 4, 2011
I 'Just' Lost it Last Month
"I just lost it last month," she said. Was she expecting that statement wouldn’t make her look a slut after fucking a guy she had always told she was a virgin? I mean, this chic had been claiming virgin she might as well tattoo it on her forehead, V-I-R-G-I-N, 'cause she acted/talked/looked...damn! She even kissed like one. So blah! blah! blah! After all said and done she decided she was 'ready' only for it to be revealed she wasn't a virgin. Then she said, "I just lost it that month". Ok, if that was to 'just'ify she had been sexually active for a short while and might as well be regarded a virgin she definitely chose a bad start for her career. [At least] two guys within few weeks, the other guy was the one she supposedly lost it to. Even if it was true, considering what she endured during the last round of hot marathon sex, the third guy would never believe she had played for only two teams.
Girls, PLEASE, there is no need to add insult to it and lie you haven't fucked. The fact that you are fucking discreetly says a lot already and don't try to be honourable about it. Don’t say shit like “I only have sex with my boyfriend”, “I don’t have sex within a year of dating”, or “I've decided to stop having sex because it messes up relationships”. With that said, "Fuck your guts for uttering those words, BITCH!"
Friday, June 3, 2011
Dr. Death Died: Jack Kevorkian
He came up with "Patholysis" as a medical term. "Path" meant disease or suffering, while "Lysis" meant destruction. Patholysis; destruction of suffering. Others called what he did assisted-suicide and Dr. Jack Kevorkian became known as Dr. Death.
There are lots of reasons a person might want to end his life, the statement is debatable even the choice to end it in the first place. Politically, Morally, Spiritually...you name it, but the fact remained he helped plus or minus 130 people end their lives. These were people that were terminally ill and to be honest, at that moment you don't take drugs to cure yourself but to reduce the pain and prolong the suffering. He served jail time for "patholysis" he conducted on a patient with Lou Gehrig's disease. For those who don't know what that is I will take three words from wikipedia that describes it all "unable to function". Patients with this disease might lose the ability to blink. Normally, Dr. Death designed a machine and all the had to do was push a button and painless dying process began, this patient couldn't even do that. He was jailed for 2nd degree murder cause he had to do it himself.
After 8 years he was released and died with complications associated with pneumonia and kidney problems, probably pulmonary thrombosis 3rd of June, 2011. He had been hospitalised and his death was not assisted. Unlike those he assisted to die, at age 83 he probably had more will to live. Dr. Death, Jack Korvokian, died. I guess that strips him of his title.
You could watch the movie "You Don't Know Jack", Al Pacino played him in character.
There are lots of reasons a person might want to end his life, the statement is debatable even the choice to end it in the first place. Politically, Morally, Spiritually...you name it, but the fact remained he helped plus or minus 130 people end their lives. These were people that were terminally ill and to be honest, at that moment you don't take drugs to cure yourself but to reduce the pain and prolong the suffering. He served jail time for "patholysis" he conducted on a patient with Lou Gehrig's disease. For those who don't know what that is I will take three words from wikipedia that describes it all "unable to function". Patients with this disease might lose the ability to blink. Normally, Dr. Death designed a machine and all the had to do was push a button and painless dying process began, this patient couldn't even do that. He was jailed for 2nd degree murder cause he had to do it himself.
After 8 years he was released and died with complications associated with pneumonia and kidney problems, probably pulmonary thrombosis 3rd of June, 2011. He had been hospitalised and his death was not assisted. Unlike those he assisted to die, at age 83 he probably had more will to live. Dr. Death, Jack Korvokian, died. I guess that strips him of his title.
You could watch the movie "You Don't Know Jack", Al Pacino played him in character.
Live Your Life: 5 Death-bed Regrets
They say everyone have got regrets, you have to learn to live with them. Some say they don't have any while others drown in them. The truth is when the sun is setting in our lives everything becomes bright. To retrospect on the (should have/would have/could have) done become obvious and it would be easy to know if the life lived was fulfilled. I stumbled upon a site where a nurse stated the top 5 death-bed regrets she had heard in years of experience. Learn from it.
1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
2. I wish I didn't work so hard.
3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
I have decided to add the link to the site http://cot.ag/ivZFq0 if you want to check it out. I use to think on my death bed my thoughts would circle round, "Who is going to update my Facebook/Twitter status?"
1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
2. I wish I didn't work so hard.
3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
I have decided to add the link to the site http://cot.ag/ivZFq0 if you want to check it out. I use to think on my death bed my thoughts would circle round, "Who is going to update my Facebook/Twitter status?"
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