Tito

I was on my way home from work when I was approached by a guy in my area. He was familiar, as in, we never conversed except the occassional "Chairman, how far?" and I keep walking. This time the conversation lasted longer with him telling me about me (sic). That I was cool and all, you know (things I knew), just diligently maintaining my own lane. Like he was going to honour me with an award he told me about a girl Tito (actual nickname) and how she was the perfect girl for me. How we would compliment each other with all those ish. I have to admit this was a new height, I have had girls hit on me, drop lines, to get my number but not a guy do it for a girl I had no idea existed. He gave me her number and told me I should buzz her the next day, by then he would have talked to her about me. Imagine, even the girl had no idea I existed.
I called her (finally) and by the time I hung up I had one impression of her, the girl was rude which I included in a text message to her, why I wouldn't call her again. You don't have to insult anyone undeservingly to be regarded rude, I'm able to know if the person was close to the border. Since I don't want 99 problems and a bitch to be one, I closed that chapter after the phone call, Tito had to park well. Few hours later, she called to tell me she was in my area, supposedly to see her aunt, and wanted to see me. This girl was getting rude and relentless.
I met her, and what I can say about her physical appearance was "she looked aiit", not a striking feature, just aiit. Apparently the guy told her I wanted to date her and she came to know what I "saw" in her to ask her out. I wasn't a cassanova but I was hardly single. There were always beautiful faces around me and this girl definitely had no idea who I was to think I'll go to that (short) lenght to get her. My relationship status was similar to Jose Mourihno's managerial jobs. I might be in a relationship without the potential to last and the girlfriend(s) would keep making threats to "sack" me BUT by the time I'm single offers come immediately. Even those that ex me table new contract. I played along with the notion the babe had.
This babe told me there was 3 conditions I had to fuifil to qualify as her boyfriend. First, I had to be caring. Second, I had to be capable to provide her needs. Third, I had to...(Damn! Forgotten). Well, we had to discuss each one. I asked her to tell me the first condition again and she replied that I must be capable (I thought that was the second, anyway). Capable in what sense? This babe said I must be able to provide her needs like buy phones, clothes...all those material things. I had to ask, "what about your parents, are they dead?" This babe made a (stupid) point, "What would be the use of a boyfriend, if he can't take care of me. My parents pay my school fees and feed me, I can't ask them for everything." I told her, "apparently your parents do the most important things in your life." She said her ex boyfriends use to buy stuffs for her like phones and I told her they had to be Yahoo Guys. She couldn't defend that, Yahoo guys (temporarily) spoil business for we non-Yahoo guys, spending stupidly on stupid girls making them see that as a norm. I told her I wasn't an IT guy and I refuse to buy a phone for a girl because...then I realised she was using a Nokia 2100, those Made for Africa phones with torchlights. "Which boyfriend bought this for you because I can do better by giving you one of my phones?"
At that point she had to leave, I had enough of juvy yarns for a day. I talked to her about changing her mentality. It would take nothing to lie just to f*ck her and breakup after. She would ask why, and I'll let her know I've realised I couldn't meet up to her needs and decided to terminate the contract.
I met the guy that gave me her number two days later. I thanked him for introducing me to the type of girls I felt I left behind in the Univeristy (for good reasons). He reacted when I mentioned the phone issue and he cleared me. Getting a Blackberry had always been the girl's dream. Her ex-boyfriend/fuck mate/fulltime IT guy, got a Blackberry 9800 (White) for her once and collected it back when they fought/brokeup/stopped fucking. That really traumatised her (not the end of the relationship though but the phone). She had been trying to get back that phone but she was broke (not only financially but mentally). Another guy she met promised to get her the phone just to f*ck her. She would come to his place and talk about the phone from am to pm, she was even specific, the white one with a silver lining. The guy told her he had ordered it online and would get to Nigeria in 2 weeks. For the next 2 weeks he fucked her like her pussy was about to expire. The two weeks elapsed and he came with another format that it was stuck with customs. When he got fed up he ended the "relationship". Who would have guessed this girl won't learn. She still brought up the get me a phone ish whenever she met a guy.
The guy called the girl that she messed up with me. He later told me the girl had changed and to prove it she would f*ck me when/if next I see her. I had to pass on that offer. I'm allergic to broke girls and cheap pussy, not to mention a broke girl with a cheap pussy. Word!