Thursday, December 22, 2011

Fat Detected...Please Step Back

By the way, this is the first post I would be typing/uploading from a computer.

WARNING: If you are a plus size individual or you are sensitive to issues of plus size individuals PLEASE (na so I beg you) you can stop reading from this point ----> .

One thing about me is that I am attracted to sweet scent...I love it. That's why I've got different types of air freshers in my Stamford Bridge. I woke up one afternoon and realised I was out of air freshners. Like they all planned it. I decided to go to one "Shoprite" in my area to get refills. After several stopovers gisting with friends I got there around 8: 25pm which was close to their closing time (8:30pm). A fat woman was ahead of me so I had to wait for her to enter. The doors were those locally made revolving one with metal frames and no glass.

Her first attempt to enter was a failed one...she got stuck and had to come back out. Her second attempt was also a failed one. The security officer begin to give her techniques, if felt like when you attempt to enter a bank and the doors won't open because you had a metal object on you. Then the security officer begins to ask you questions about what you had in your possession and you begin to get yourself "naked" just to find that metal. This woman was in a similar condition and I needed her to get her fat ass in because I needed to get my air freshers. She kept changing styles and tucking her tummy but all attempts failed. A queue began to form inside the building of shoppers that wanted to exit. In the end she gave up. By the time I wanted to get in with my small frame I was stopped by the security officer and told me it was pass their closing time. I checked the time on my watch it was 8:35pm. 

I had to go home like that. The woman just wasted my time.


  1. Ahn ahn!!! You're a badt guy, you should have offered to do her shopping while she waits outside LOL!

    BTW, do you know the kind of vernom that can be unleashed on you if certain people read this post?

    Finally, they are big people not fat!
    (in Princess the comedienne's voice) what is 'strong' with you!!!

  2. you and your fat jokes...see me see wahala o!

    LOL, i can't imagine. I told my mom that she is not to allow me to be a fat bride and if i get to the point where i can't fit through a door she is to shoot me on sight, even as i struggle.

  3. Oh dear. said very empathically on her account and yours.

    Merry Christmas!!

  4. Just one of those things...but the woman walked away smiling as if it was a normal thing.