Her Love, is Like NEPA

When you consider power generation in developing nations one issue open for discuss is the epileptic nature. So if I compare a girlfriend’s love to the National Electric Power Authority (NEPA) you should have an idea of what I mean, after all Nigerians know NEPA is undependable. There is this love/hate relationship between operations of NEPA and Nigerians. Using street lingua, NEPA can ‘take light’ for over a week and during this period curses are rained on the corporations as if it were a person. The moment NEPA ‘brings light’ there is excitement and jubilation everywhere with screams of ‘UP NEPA’. Even if NEPA brings light for two straight days, people become sceptic and await NEPA taking the light. The fear is based on the belief that if NEPA should give light for a ‘long period’ like 24 hours, then prepare for a really long period of black out. By the time NEPA take the light people resume raining curses.

I had a girlfriend that made me feel I was in a relationship with NEPA. She made me relate perfectly to Katy Perry’s ‘Hot n Cold’. Funny enough, I liked that (initially) and she liked that, so it was likely I couldn’t leave her and she was free to act anyway she liked. Like I said her love was like NEPA but it wasn’t always like that. She was funny, not as funny as I was but she made me laugh. When we were together nothing else mattered. Things began to change when something came up and she had to stay with friends I wasn’t cool with. It began with ‘I need to hang out with my friends’; after she started hanging out with her friends’ friends which by now had become her friends and I was no one’s friend. Seeing her became difficult but whenever I saw her I didn’t care if the past one week we only communicated on phone. I later realised talking on phone was even a luxury, it was as if she was avoiding me and when I least expected she would look for me and be all over me. Honestly, it felt good and made our ‘reunion’ something to look forward to. Anytime she did her ‘unprecedented seasonal migration’ I felt alone especially when she switched off her phone. It was like she had taken light I was blacked out.

Now, every Nigerian knows due to the epileptic nature of NEPA it was wise to have a generating plant in their homes. It made you feel prepared for a blackout, anytime. The generator came on whenever NEPA took the light. Call it cheating but I decided to have a ‘generator’. She was someone who admired me, didn’t know my girlfriend, and cherished my attention and she made it difficult for me to miss… who again? Oh! my girlfriend. Sure whenever my girlfriend was around I was happier but her disappearing act didn’t leave me with nothing to entertain myself. I wasn’t happy with all that was going down but I was satisfied. The downside with my girl by the side was like all generating set you had to take care of it; change oil, service and all that. I did that without complaining after all it was the cost of being satisfied. One day my girl by the side gave me a speech I once gave my girlfriend. It was about why I didn’t always have her time. Sure I had off days anytime my girlfriend was around. My understanding from what she said was although I saw her as my generator, she saw me as her NEPA and that was a whole new cycle because I saw her having a generator of her own. Damn! What can one do for an interrupted power supply? I decided to solve it the best way I could and the outcome was not what I expected. I’ll just say the engine of my generator knocked and my transformer blew (What happened is for another day). Why should I complain after all the cave men lived without electricity.