ONCE IS ENOUGH

The image above (and I hope it is above) if from the 2013 biographical movie RUSH. Spoiler warning: All his life, James Hunt drove himself to become the Fomular 1 champion and he made it, once. After becoming World Champion, he did not feel motivated to repeat it. It felt like he became too satisfied and there was the point of winning it twice. I know at this point you probably feel that this is a motivational piece, and maybe it is. You see, I feel like James Hunt and his Fomular 1 glory when it comes to s%x. It doesn't matter how long I get you, once I have you once it is enough.

I probably mentioned it once, a vague statistics of girls I slept with based on freqency will probable look like the table below. What that means is my S%xual Law of Diminishing Returns is waaaay to fast.

By the way, it is in percentage, so do not add up the numbers and assume...anyway, it could be 5 girls I have had s%x with or 5,000, the stats shows statistics (some still won't get it).

I have decided to consciously work on this anomaly (technically speaking the stats is OK for a bachelor) and bang more girls more than three separate days to change the flow of the stats and maybe I will find a wife.<---something feels wrong with this statement.

Anyway, I am about to begin..."hey you...

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ARMED POLICE ROBBERS

I was attacked by armed robbers at that Gbagada U-turn bridge…few metres after the Mobil filling station on Saturday (June 4) at about 10:30pm.  It was surreal because of two reasons. First, I had escaped an attempt twice at that same spot and I had mentioned to my friend, who was behind the wheels, to be careful as we approached the bridge. As he drove up the bridge, I spotted a Jeep parked at the centre of the bridge and two cars drove slowly behind us. The Jeep with registration number AAA856CN began to reverse (awkwardly) and I had a lucky guess. I opened the door to run down the bush path by the side of the bridge but had not turn back. Maybe stupidity but I could not leave my guy behind.  Four men fully armed descended on us, shoved us in the back seat, and one of them drove our car. They kept ranting threats…”Kill! Money!! Now!!! Those sorts of things.  The Lexus jeep drove behind my car and we began a tour of Lagos Mainland. Anyway, we were robbed- phones stolen and the armed robbers drove to the new GTbank at Ilupeju, along Ikorodu Road to withdraw the funds in my account.  One of them  walked into the ATM to empty the account boldly. Their next destination was Surulere, driving aimlessly (I thought) because they had no idea what to do with us after they stole all we had and the fuel level was low.  They spotted an unlucky chic driving a white jeep alone on the bridge heading to Jibowu. By the way, they drove pass police checkpoints several times without being stopped #justSaying. Back to the chic in a white jeep, my car was used to obstruct hers and their Jeep parked behind her to box her in. The four guys in my car ran out and the same scenario I witnessed about two hours ago played out with the girl as the victim (Yes! We were with them for almost two hours…long story and dispense errors). They abandoned my friend and I in the car and zoomed off with their new victim. The guy that I supposed was their leader threw my key out of the window as they drove off. That was about 12:20am

I had this nasty headache as my head was hit earlier with the butt of a gun as I drove home…it was a state of disbelief. The next morning, I decided to report to the police station at Ifako and spotted a UBA debit card where one of the armed robbers sat- SAHEED BOLAJI 5199 1101 ****1419. I assumed it must be for one of them. On my way to the station, I felt this was an easy case for the police to crack. I had the registration number of the car that obstructed me in the first place; one of the robbers used the ATM which must have taken his picture, and now a debit card which might belong to any of them. One of these three variables would be a lead… I thought

(Not)surprising the officers that attended to me at Ifako police station made me feel like I wasted my time to report the case. First, I was talked to as if it was my fault. Imagine this stupid question, “Why do you walk around with your ATM card, don’t you know that you are setting yourself up?”  At that moment I had no tolerance for BS and my friend was in that same boat. As a Nigerian, I replied the question with another question. “The value of any debit card is the amount in the account which might not be up to N30,000 but most people’s phones  are more expensive than their bank balance, does that mean they should leave their phones at home?” My intention was to pen my statement and move ahead. The officer behind the counter opened his mouth and demand N5,000 to file the case. He posed a threat that if the owner of the debit card reports it stolen before I file my report that I might be in serious trouble. I will have to explain how it got to my possession and it will appear I reported the case because I had to exonerate myself (that kin BS). I had to remind him the reason I was there and that my account was emptied. I had to ask, “do you expect me to steal N5,000?” He reduced the amount to N2,000 as if it was a favour. They were damn serious to receive this amount until a mutual friend at the station paid.

The next day, I called the Inspector and he responded that there was nothing he could do because investigation will take time and money, and if I had both I should come to the station. His attempt was to convince me with his countenance that that was the end of the case and I should count my loss and thank God I was alive. I am grateful to be alive but the point these criminals have to be stopped because their activities have become rampant with careless regard. I was born and breed in Gbagada and it can reoccur and involve someone that I know.

 I mean, investigation is not hard (is it) if there is effort. For instance, it is possible the vehicle used to rob me was stolen but at least identify the owner. All the police had to do was log in on FRSC website (http://www.nvisng.org/NumberPlateVerification.aspx) to determine the owner. At least, from the platform available to the public the feedback was “Number Plate is valid and assigned to N/A Lexus Rx 330” On their platform you get the owner’s information and this is less than a minute (even if your network is as slow as …) Next was to approach GTbank for ATM CCTV footage, the last withdrawal was at 12:01am June 5^th and we can obtain the robber’s image. The inspector’s response to this suggestion was “So what should I do with the picture because I don’t recognise him or do you recognise him?” In this day and age of social media, someone will recognise him. The UBA debit card left in my car was also pushed aside, “since they don’t know the owner”.

It sucks really, because this will keep happening and we are place in a position to rather inform our relatives and friends to be careful rather than the police. By the way, I feel for whosoever buys my stolen phone Samsung phone. Stealing phones nowadays is similar to stealing GPS, you will get caught.

CAUSE YOU CAN: POWER OF CONTEXT: SUGARBELLY

CAUSE YOU CAN

4k the title, this isn't a motivational piece but a piece of my mind on people who exploit others because they can by virtue of...life. The beauty of life is everyone has a unique role to play, and the ugly aspect of that script is that some people's role is to be a subordinate (or lesser in status) to another individual in order to achieve [balance]. Now imagine the other individual is a dick head. A dick head you have to work/date/interact with in order not to blow your job...or whatever. We can only hope that if we find ourselves in the later position, we do not get exploited. So we pray for a good boss or an understanding spouse. However, the person who is "superior" pray the status quo remain. Trust me, even your boss won't want you to be their boss. I try to assume why certain [wicked] people act the way they do and that takes me back to a thought I once discussed somewhere in this blog. 

I learnt early in life two opposing reasons we do things. First, because we can and secondly because we need it. I learnt that from the random girls I met and that I saw an opportunity to smash. It kinda comes with a don feeling, meet a chic, chat her up, get her naked...orgasm. The cycle continued until a point I realized that I didn't need to smash every girl that presented herself, I only did it because I could. It was the innate craving of man to seize every opportunity and acquire everything, even those things not needed. That's why a millionaire wants to be billionaire while a billionaire wants to rule the world. The same insatiable feeling to become the President after years of being a Governor. It is also the same feeling to exploit an individual who had given you heart, body, and soul...because you can 'cause you definitely don't need it. 

This takes me to @Sugarbelly ...

POWER OF CONTEXT

This lady once referred to me as ignorant on my own blog. PAUSE...

That sentence will no doubt create an opinion. It could be positive or negative opinion about her to just label an individual [like me] "ignorant". Fact is whatever your opinion is, it would be baseless until you understood the context she referred to me as ignorant. The importance of context is sooo powerful that we will NEVER understand ourselves and the people around us until we accept that fact. 

An example I use to explain the importance to friends is the concept of personal space or proxemic rules. For instance, If you were to stand by the roadside and someone walks towards you. The person stands close to you shoulder-to-shoulder, you might be a bit uncomfortable and decide to take steps back BUT if you were to be inside a public bus with the same person standing so close, you might not even be aware of their presence. It is still the same act with only difference being context. Another instance a lady hears "let me examine your breast". She might resist if the person is a stranger [lawyer] than if the stranger is a doctor. That's why I do not attempt to "change" people. Instead, I attempt to change the environment [context] to the one that will make them do the things I want.

While environment is a strong factor in changing context, the strongest is abstract- our emotions. Either positive or negative, emotions make us do things we won't [normally] do. Things we can't explain with logic like why Romeo and Juliet commit suicide [silly teenagers]. 

I read opinions about @Sugarbelly's... narration of how a guy she once loved took advantage of her. I won't refer to it as confession because she always talked about it but the only difference was she finally decided to mention names. My own observation, especially with people who discredit her or attempt to shame her is that they applied logic and not explore the context to understand her view. Her narration was probably read as "50 Shades of Audu".  

I remember one of my friends back in school. The guy was a ladies man and had a naive chic all over him...The girl was down and ready to do whatever he wanted. He even smashed her once while we were in the same room...and this was supposed to be his girlfriend. So I am quite familiar with girls having a "I have to satisfy my guy mentality" even when being exploited.

 I will go with @Sugarbelly on this one and the reason is simple, her pain is just too real. I told a colleague at work she had been on this for years to fake it and even if she did she gets A for Effort. Plus, she tackles anyone who write stuffs that seems they took advantage of a female. So that's what earned me "ignorant". 

With that said...

Any relationship that won't make you a better person is slave trade. 

Begin with no Excuse in Mind

"Begin with the end in mind". Isn't that one of the habits of highly effective people? To apply that habit in one's career goals might be a bit straight forward, but how does that apply in relationships…how do you determine what you want in a relationship with someone you just met? As [kids], the end might be to get to the 3rd base but as we get older, third base is usually the first base so that goal becomes baseless. Relationships become complex [please note that the only factor that makes relationships complex are excuses]. So relationships become filled with excuses. Excuses about why you love A and B but want to hook up with C. Excuses about why you cannot maintain a steady relationship. Excuses about why you want to break up. To make up excuses is one of the habits of highly ineffective people. 

I do not make excuses in relationships [unnecessarily], then again I do not have a specific end in mind… [see last paragraph]. I am a guy that goes with the flow and if at any moment the girlfriend says, "We need to talk?" My response is like, "OK. Do you want to break up?..No wahala". 

I am not a though guy, maybe a bit insensitive but I know a few things I want in a relationship. One of them is to date someone that has no significant doubt about dating me. There is no point attempting to convince a partner on why she should stay in a relationship when she wants out. She must have nursed the idea for weeks and had the courage/confidence to voice it. I wrote in a previous post that the day major decisions are made and they day they were taken are not the same. They might even be months apart. If from your previous relationships you never saw the breakup coming, that is a cogent reason to accept the breakup proposal. 

I know single ladies who claim to have the end in mind before they jump into any relationship. The [potential] is assessed before they accept to be exclusive [or not] and the end to 'em is usually marriage. How sweet! The fault of my Nigeria ladies it the failure to understand that to have the end in mind is not the same as to begin with the end in mind. For instance, a tennis player might have a career goal to win Wimbledon, which is the easy part. To BEGIN with the end in mind would involve the training sessions and all those exhaustive practice to win Wimbledon. But my Nigeria ladies prefer to only have the end in mind, and then they sit it out. If they are lucky to get a husband they begin to eat it out. I met a chic once who was all prophetic about her [yet to exist] future husband. She had rehearsed the wedding in her mind which exposed her wild imagination. She also provided insight about what her family life would be like. My response was, "You actually think you deserve such with your current lifestyle".

I do not have a specific end in mind that I apply in all relationships. That is because I recognise that individuals are unique and each make me crave for things based on their personality. I meet certain girls and the end is sex, just friends, or business associate. Yet to meet a chic whose personality will make me think of marriage. They talk about it but can't act it and I am a good judge of character.

How Not To Date

Everyday you are going to meet people, men that you might not be certain of their intention apart from what they say...

As much as it will be unwise to give all a try, I will suggest you narrow your attention to the ones you are interested in...

Even when you meet someone you have interest in, I will suggest that you do not think through the relationship in your head prior to things happening...

Do not create (false) expectations. You already know what happens when you daydream of a family with a guy that hasn't proposed 

Trust your instinct at times, and when in doubt- don't 

I understand you tell me certain things because you have doubts but there are 3 main reasons I am not in any position to help effectively...

1. Whatever you tell me about the guys is based on your subjective opinion.

2. You usually leave the important details out and that makes it difficult to see the big picture.

3. You never listen

...only when it is convenient for you. 

You need to making friends out of the guys you meet. You make a mistake of giving the guy's "titles" like "prospect", "boyfriend", "the one"...

and you relate with them based on those titles

Take [your ex] for instance, he became a boyfriend without being a friend first...

That's why it is difficult for you guys to remain friends when you take the title away

Even the subsequent guys you met, you rather give them double promotion to boyfriend before they become friends...and that's why it's difficult to justify to yourself why you should consider them

So when you meet a guy, before you grant them titles please make them friends first 

3 Important Experiences you Need for a Healthy Relationship- Experience 1

Relationship is like education. In education, an individual needs to acquire the knowledge of a particular or several disciplines to aid the mastery of what was taught. This acquisition process is usually in stages and it could span decades. That's why is unusual to be awarded a Ph.d on the first day of elementary school. I believe people need to have such acquisition process in relationships. The knowledge to understand relationships is not in the classroom but rather in experiences. 

A lot of people are in messed up relationships. The become messed up themselves after the relationship is...over. At that moment, some wonder what went wrong, who was wrong, and ask "I can't believe I could be that stupid/gullible?"

Relationships are complicated [at times] but it is not rocket science. I observed people that suffer withdrawal symptoms aftermath of a wrecked relationship lacked 3 main experiences. I know that the acquisition of these experiences  will boost the self esteem and confidence of anyone in and out of the relationship. 

Experience 1: To have a strong affection towards someone that doesn't feel the same way. 

This experience is acquired early in life and mostly by guys. Such guys developed such attraction towards someone and got turned down in the most humiliating way ever. I don't include crush on celebrities, but people we are accessible to. 

The knowledge acquired is that not everyone is for everybody. The individual realise that the love for another does not translate to the feeling being reciprocated. You either become friendzoned or avoided. 

People who acquire this experience in their twenties, thirties, or forties react to such rejection with a negative approach. They tend to believe "something" must be wrong with them INSTEAD of "it wasn't meant to be". 

I Went Soft

I could assume every chic wants a strong man by her side. Someone who's capable to make her feel protected at all times. The most important quality of a strong man is to make that d!ck hard...and strong. No apologies but having all the 6 packs ain't worth sh!t if you can't maintain your 6 or 7 inches for about 30 minutes. Isn't that the real man?

Sex should be exciting, after all, "excitement stage" is included in the sexual response cycle. ‎But lately, my sex life is faaaaar from exciting. It feels like work, it feels like prelude to a cum and once I have an orgasm everything about sex irritates. 

Years ago, I watched a movie about a guy who had sex indiscriminately till it got to a stage he couldn't have an orgasm and began to fake it. ‎I know girls fake it and that's because they cum too slow but guys? I thought that part in the movie was science fiction, but lately...

A friend told me his penis went soft while fuck!ng. He didn't cum but went soft while thrusting. In his defence his mind was engrossed on how to make money. The babe got pissed and concluded she wasn't attractive enough. It felt hard to believe.

I had a similar experience; I was having sex and didn't feel it. I knew I won't have an orgasm because my d!ck wasn't excited. I asked the chic at intervals if she had an orgasm and stopped as soon as she came. 

Nowadays I had to get drunk to fu*k cause my mind wanders and stop feeling things. I am getting soft.

HAPPY EASTER 2015

Happy Easter everybody...If I am right, then today symbolises Jesus Christ's rising/ascension. Well, let me also raise this blog from the "dead".

BLOG RISEN.

I didn't have any plan today, probably to go watch Fast & Furious 7, before I received a call/invite to attend AY Live with one fine geh like that. The night could end in several ways, regardless, I hope it's interesting. 

Waaay up, I feel blessed!

Happy Easter and don't eat meat, even if it's p***y.

Proposals! Proposals!! Proposals!!!

The year is almost elapsed and I can bet a whole lot of females out there are disappointed. Disappointment from not walking down the isle in 2014. These set of females probably attended more wedding ceremony of friends t‎han a priest, and have racks of aso-ebi. Enough aso-ebi to start a boutique. "2015 will not be the same", they say.

The females with strong conviction are a step ahead this December by getting the boyfriend to propose. Does the proposal really mean anything? A guy proposed to his girlfriend cause she threatened to leave, so he "gave" her the ring with the plan to marry 2016. ‎A friend got married recently after almost 2 year-engagement. The wedding was more like a shotgun ceremony 'cause she was tired of the wait.

I wish everyone the best, especially those who asked the question this month. As long as you know the reason you want to get married and why that person, you will have a "satisfied" marriage.

How You Cheat?

‎To cheat is to accept a fact that woman/man is insatiable and this act is the main proof of that fact in any relationship. What we want in relationships are basic- probably good looks, good sex, comfort. They are so basic that when satisfied we see the scars in the good looks, the monotony is the sex, and the comfort comes with [heart]ache.

There is a role everyone [un]consciously play in relationships which is to be on the lookout for cues our partner is unfaithful- how they cheat. There was a guy who memorised every item the girlfriend owned. He also knew the number of panties she owned and their colours. What a talent! He was so observant and the motivation was to determine if the girlfriend cheated. Each time he noticed a new item with her he questioned the source, suspecting it was from another guy.

Others with less mental ability to memorise prefer to ask questions...all the time. They act like Customer Care rep in the relationship. They question every act: it could be as worse as a silly question on why the partner spent 5 minutes 10 seconds in the bathroom instead of the average 4 minutes 50 seconds they were used to. A girl once told me she got to her boyfriend's place and rushed to the bathroom. Her boyfriend's questioned, "what are you washing off? Where were you?"

I dated a few girls that cheat and because I am the type of person who doesn't act on the spot. I was able to observe their behaviour prior to the confrontation. That was how I noticed a pattern on how [you] cheat. The [YOU] is every girl who cheated on me.

I noticed [you] cheat when you became incredibly forgiving. There were things I did that usually piss her off that didn't seem to move her anymore. That was how I discovered she was getting the D outside. In her mind, she was settling scores with her "forgiveness".

Once a girl begin to get the D outside, it becomes a bit easier to know how [you] cheat. I had a girlfriend that suddenly came up with karmasutra like styles. It started from the kiss, she did new things I knew she had a practical exercise. It was excitingly different. The same girl that preferred missionary style surprised me with a super reverse cowgirl. Few days of keen observation, I found out the guy she had been sleeping with.

I noticed [you] cheat when you call to know where I was and after my response you either say "I'm about to sleep" or "I'm about to visit a family member" living at my opposite direction.

One request, what are the signs that easily give away your cheating partner?

I'm Back!!!

‎Please don't tell anyone, I'm back to Story of the Year and I have a whole lot of story for the gods. In all honesty, I needed the break because I was saturated and needed to live more. 

When I retrospect from my first post to now, things have changed. From 2010, as I was about to graduate from the University of Lagos, to November 2014 a whole have happened.

I got a well paid job and became a millionaire (in Naira and probably in few countries in Africa). I'm also tilting to the other "side" in relationships when the babe chase the guy. After all, I'm richer than most of their parents.

So the experiences I will share in the next posts should be great (if I pen it well). I am going to end this one here, the girl that is about to suck my d¡ck just stepped in.

Black Wedding Dress

The first mistake anyone can make is an attempt to make everyone happy. Yes, it is only an attempt because it can NEVER happen. Hey, if Jesus Christ could be persecuted, who are you?


All things being equal, shouldn't it be easy to please everyone because the norms have been established. We basically know what the society expect from us, so why is it too difficult to make everyone satisfied with us? People get socialized on how best to talk, act- based on the situation, and we also have the 10 commandments. But even those that adhere to everything might be labeled "hypocrite" or "pretentious" to use a lighter word.


It is established, you can't please everyone...why not do what you want, what makes you happy yet a better person, and damn the norm that states your social limitation...even if it means you rock a black wedding dress.

When Jesus Say Yes

Facebook post.

A quick one, "Say Yes" by Michelle Williams might be her biggest solo hit yet. +1.5millon Youtube views in <72hours is more than the total views of her previous solo videos.

I like the track, maybe because the chorus was lifted from one of Nigeria's favourite gospel song. Regardless, it was beautiful and all the 'Children came with her style. I mean, even Beyonce rocked a bum short in the video.

The song was produces by Samuel Hamony, a British with Nigerian parents. That might explain the song's source of inspiration. Samuel also produced "Kele Kele Love" and "Love Me (x3)" for Aunty Tiwa Savage.

So...who is the original composer of "When Jesus Say Yes!" with publishing deal? Time to make money.

PREMARITAL SIN

I understand certain religions identified pre-marital sex as a sin. However, I do not identify is as evil. Evil in this context is the intention to cause harm to another party, also, the harm done can be regarded as evil. I do not label two consenting adults who engage in premarital sex as evil because I cannot identify any harm done.



What I do understand is whatever is [not] permitted sexually between unmarried couples also goes for married couples. Three of them will be mentioned.



First, If you are in a relationship with someone, married/unmarried, you cannot sleep around and expect your partner to pat you in the back- it is called cheating.

Second, the consequence and responsibilities are equal as far as sex is concerned. If the female gets pregnant, the marriage status is not an excuse to avoid responsibility. If the "man" was naturally irresponsible it will be evident regardless. Also, the spread of STDs and STIs is not exclusive to unmarried or married couples. Married couples are even worst hit because you cannot negotiate condom use in your matrimonial bed.



Third, if the girlfriend or wife was not interested in having sex and the "man" decide to force his way- that is rape. Wedding ring is not immunity to that crime.



So why is premarital sex preached to youths as if the end of it will ultimately make the world a better place [maybe].



I do understand every sin has its orgin, what is the origin of fornication that made it a sin?

DORO MEGA SUPER STAR O!

 

Remembering what I should be doing instead of the financial institution I slave...

 

 

 

My Prayer for You Today...

My Prayer for you today is not to collapse at the edge of the finish line. The disappointment of putting all in a task and fail to accomplish in  the end sucks. Makes one feel why bother start. With that said, you know what to

Death Does NOT Care About Your Dreams

Everyone have dreams. The misconception humans have with theirs was it had to come to past before death knocks. Well, death does not care about anyone's dream. Unless the dream was to die someday [doesn't guarantee to know when it strikes].

Deaths is an inevitable occurrence humans deny, unless the world was a movie where only the bad guy dies. Even in Games of Thrones anyone dies regardless of the dreams/plans they had.
With that said, live a bit more today. Express yourself to family and friends and remember this quote from Drake "everybody dies but not everybody lives".

Strength to Move On

Feeling a bit lost, careless, and irrational. I arrived at that conclusion based on events in April. Things happened that I am not proud of but have to live with it (do I even have a choice?). All I need now- is the strength to move on.

As Fast As Wikipedia...Vybz Kartel

You know what, I have to honour Wikipedia for fast updates. It's like there are people with fingers on their keyboard, waiting to update an article and press ENTER within the second.

I remember when the rapper Proof died, guess where I confirmed the news, Wikipedia. The date he died was included...with no delay.

So now, I heard Vybz Kartel was sentenced to 35 to life and guess the latest update on his Wikipedia page...

Quite funny though, Years active 2000 to 2014.

What's up?

Lately, I've had lots of experiences...so many I haven't had the time to pen 'em. I have to give credit to my workload on the job- there's so much to do one might be tempted to pray for few more hours during daytime.

Right now, I'm on the toilet bowl pretending to do "number two" while I do the one thing I love. Mehn...so needed the timeout.

But is this what life is. I learnt a quote from The Bee Movie, you've all your life (in school) to the point where you work for the rest of your life. Ouch!
Is this the point I should start to think of marriage? Yea, right.
Go to get back to work, shit! No network