Monday, August 22, 2011

Couple's Palava

I've witnessed married couples fight countless times and one thing I have noticed is that, like snow flakes they were hardly the same not to mention ending the same. The one that woke me this morning put a smile on my face.

It was a young couple blessed with two beautiful girls. The man was known for his impeccable dress sense. If it were possible this man would put on an Armani suit to swim. He was that self conscious. The wife on the other hand was...ok, at least it was obvious she had a husband taking care of her and not just "the man of the house". I was about to make the transition to being awake when I heard the wife and husband screaming at each other. There was no physical attack but a verbal one that felt more like a question and answer session.

A sentence the wife made summarised the supposed reason for the early morning showdown, "Everytime you'll be telling me you want a male child, is it my fault?"
The husband responded, "Yes! It is your fault."
Wife: How, am I the one doing me [sleeping with me].
Husband: It don't know but I KNOW I am complete.
Wife: Should I sleep with another man for us to confirm that?
Husband: the fact that you have been giving birth to girls is enough.
Wife: what are you insinuating, are you saying your daughters are not yours? Speak up and be straight forward like your penis.
Husband: Don't put words in my mouth, I don't have time for this.
Wife: That is your problem, you don't always have time and when you do there is no time. Do you think it takes less than two minutes to make a boy?
Husband: I work hard because I have to cater for this family.
Wife: you are taking care of girls and you are complaining. I can't even imagine what would happen if you'll have to take care of males?
Husband: when you won't allow me this nympho.
Wife: are you not ashamed you can't satisfy your wife? Walking stick

At that point that was when the neighbours decided to intervene. I was laughing uncontrollable as I lay in bed. I know from now on I'll see the wife as the "unsatisfied" and the husband as the "one who can't satisfy".

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